Tuesday, March 18, 2014

7 Gentlemanly Behaviors That Seem Extinct

The other day I had just finished up a long day of studying at the library and I was riding the elevator down to the first floor. A guy probably a year or two older than me got on the elevator, and after we reached the first floor, he barged off, nearly knocking me over with his backpack. My first thought of course was "wow..who raised you?!" Throughout my entire drive home, I thought about all of the things that most men have apparently stopped doing when it comes to being a gentleman. 

1. Elevator etiquette
I don't care how big of a hurry you're in, or how slow she may walk, if there is a female or five on the elevator with you, you hold your arm in the door and let them off first.

2. R-E-S-P-E-C-T (sing it to the tune of Aretha Franklin)
If a female walks past you, for God's sake, do not turn your head and stare at her behind. If she is talking to you, don't stare down her shirt. If you're driving down the road, don't honk or yell "hey sexy!!!!" Gross. Undressing a girl with your eyes is one of the most disgusting and degrading things you could possibly do to her. Don't worry about getting a date, you've already ruined it by being a pig.

3. Give up your seat.
I see a lack of this all the time. The other day I watched two guys get up and offer their seats to women, and one remained seating. I could tell which ones were raised correctly. Whether she is old, young, pregnant, active, fat, skinny, whatever; if the bus, classroom, etc. is full, get up from your chair and offer your seat to a female who is standing. If you chose to stay in your seat and force ladies to remain standing, make sure you remember to take off your maxi pad on the way out. (oops, did I just say that?!)

4. Pay attention to the fact that the world is more threatening for females
We are automatic targets everywhere we go, especially at night. I don't need to get into the subject of rape. Walk your female coworkers to their cars at night. Just watch out for the women around you, they'll definitely appreciate it.

5. Be polite.
Being polite covers a pretty wide range of things. For example, if you see someone struggling to reach something on the top shelf, grab it for her. If she's struggling while trying to carry a flat screen television through Best Buy, offer to help. Even if she declines, at least you've been polite. A smile and a "good morning" can go a long way. Trust me, after we've had a rough morning of waking up late, rushing to work/class, and forgetting things at home, we do appreciate a little bit of random kindness. About a month ago I was literally having the worst day possible. There was a guy in the elevator with me in the library (why am I always here?) and he asked how my day was going. Of course, I took this one minute opportunity to complain about nursing school and how much I had to study that day. He wished me good luck on my upcoming tests and to have a much better day. I didn't even know his name but it made my WEEK.. and I still remember it. Compliment a lady today. They aren't going to automatically assume that you want to have babies with them just because you said they look nice today. You would be surprised by what can make a woman smile. Little things, men. Little things. 

6. Hold the door.
This subject is really difficult for me because i've had super awkward experiences. I'm one of those girls who always ends up having to sprint to the door because I feel bad that this guy is having to stand there and hold it open for me while I sluggishly walk to the door carrying two books, a binder, and a laptop. If we are pretty far behind, we don't expect you to hold the door open for us. It makes us feel like we need to hurry to the door. However, if there is a woman walking behind you or relatively close behind you, do NOT let a door shut on her. 

7. Driveway etiquette
I can already tell that I'm going to be one of those moms who is a stickler to this with her children. My son will know that he will NOT drive up to a female's house and honk the horn or shoot her a text that says "i'm here, come get in the car." If a guy comes to pick my future daughter up for a date, and he honks the horn or texts her to pick her up, i'm going to walk outside and tell him to go home. Walk up to the door, knock on the door, and then walk her to your car. At the end of the night, walk her back to her door. I don't care if you're just friends or you're married. It's what you're supposed to do. 

Guys: man up. Bring back gentlemanly behaviors. It would definitely be appreciated. 

XOXO,
Hope Rodriguez